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The Romantic Guide

 
SINGLES
 
 
Single, and Loving It?
By Features Editor theLounge.com.au Lisa Mitchell
 
Relationship Choices
By Paul Mauchline
 
Before You Seek Mr. or Ms. Right...
By Paul Mauchline
 
Are You The One For Me? Are You Not The One For Me?
By Paul Mauchline
 
Getting To Know You
By Paul Mauchline
 
What Does She Expect Anyway?
By Gary Caine
 
Evaluating Whether A Potential Partner May Be The One For You
By Paul Mauchline
 
The 'Perfect' Partner
By Paul Mauchline
 
The Dating Game
By Paul Mauchline
 
Can You Find "The One for You" in Cyberspace? Yes! Why Not!
By Paul Mauchline
 
Tips to Writing A Personal Ad
By Paul Mauchline
 
How do you Begin?
By Paul Mauchline
 
Meeting People Online: Is It Safe?
By Leslie Karen Lobell, M.A.
 
You've Got Mail
By Paul Mauchline
 
The Fear Of Dating
By Paul Mauchline
 

 

 
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Love
 
Tips to writing an ad for the personals on the Internet
by Paul Mauchline
Many things that we do in life require some effort, creativity, and imagination. Composing a personal ad is no exception. Your ad should reflect who you are, honestly, and the type of person you are seeking as a partner.
 
You may find it difficult to compose the right ad, one that really reflects both you and the type of person you seek. Don't be afraid to enlist the help of a close friend.
 
There are right and wrong ways to compose a personal ad. Let's look at a few of the wrong ways. Concentrating solely on your appearance or the looks of your ideal partner is one of the personal ad mistakes.
 
For example: 5'7", 110 lb. cute, blue-eyed blonde, seeks Tom Cruise look-alike for love and romance. Reply Box 1666
 
6'4", 180 lb. body builder seeks Pamela Anderson look-alike to bench press on the beach. Reply Box 2245
 
Talking about your hobbies or interests, without exposing the person that you are, is another personal ad error. For example:
Good-looking male engineer, 5'9", enjoys music, biking, country drives, seeks single white female, 20's for friendship and possible long-term relationship. Box 3065
 
Attractive, petite, youthful, professional female, enjoys the outdoors, nature, walks, water, classical and country music, sports, dining out, dancing, and theater, balanced with quiet times. Seeks single male. Box 2243
 
Focusing totally on financial or material issues does not give the reader an honest reflection of who you are. For example:
Exquisite blonde princess. University educated, intellectual, 34, 5'6", slim, fun loving. Former model with Mercedes tastes and Jaguar sensuality, looking for that special, generous, sophisticated, and refined gentleman with whom to explore life's pleasures. Box 7787
 
Harvard MBA grad, tall, dark, and handsome, late 30's, divorced, 2 children, owner of global Computer firm with homes in San Diego, Boca Raton and Switzerland, seeks wealthy, jet setting Princess, early 30's, preferably European, from an affluent family with no children. Box 2596
 
The major mistake that these three types of ads have in common is that they all focus on the outside rather than on the inside of themselves and of the partner they seek. It's like that first date where we show our socially correct persona, and are afraid to expose the layers of the individual we are. Many ads seem to take this same direction.
 
When writing your own personal ad, take the time to write one that expresses who you are, as an individual, your unique qualities and gifts, and what you want from a potential partner. It does not have to be a novel: keep it simple, short, honest, and sincere. Also, don't rush: No one says you have to write an ad in 5 minutes. It may take you a week with a hundred revisions before you are happy with the end product. However, this effort is worthwhile. Once you have placed an ad based on your inside qualities rather than your outside appearance, you will receive many more serious and sincere responses from potentially compatible people.
 
Personal ads are not for everyone, but you will never know whether or not they are for you unless you try.
 
Copyright 2000-2001. All rights reserved. Paul Mauchline
 
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