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The Mature Man's Sexuality
How can I revitalize a sagging sex life?
By Ladyfire Editor Debora Myers
As a man ages, his testosterone levels drop starting at around the age of thirty. By age 80 he generally produces one-third the amount than he did at twenty. This lowered level of testosterone can lead to waning libido. Typically the focus on lost sexual desire has been made on women and menopause. Aging and hormonal changes do not necessarily lead to the death of your sex life. Remember that our sexuality is not isolated to the percentage of sex hormones produced by our glands. We must maintain intimacy with our loved one if we desire to keep the fire in the bedroom, as we grow older. Remember that it takes two to tango! Open communication and the willingness to make the effort to stay close is what will ultimately lead to maintaining a healthy sex life in our golden years.
The changes in sexual response as a man ages linked to waning testosterone levels usually show themselves in these ways; It may take him longer to become erect; More variation may be needed in arousal techniques to achieve an erection; It may take him longer to ejaculate; Ejaculations may be less forceful or explosive; The time between ejaculations may be longer; His erection becomes flaccid sooner after he ejaculates.
What measures can I take to counter the effects of aging on my man's libido? How can I revitalize a sagging sex life? You are given some unique opportunities of gaining a more aggressive role in the bedroom. The lack of intensity of his sexual urges is not necessarily a bad thing for him or his partner. This gives you both an opportunity to play, experiment and become more intimate than ever before. He is less likely to be primarily focused on a screaming orgasm and more willing to take his time at being the sensitive and tender lover.
Be sure to open communications with him about the changes taking place. Let him know that there is no need to feel embarrassed. He may become sensitive to the fact that he is experiencing these changes and pull away from you sexually. Some partners may take this withdrawal personally if they don't understand what is happening with their man. Talk to him. Give yourselves more time for foreplay and become creative in the bedroom. Reassure him that he is still vital and alive. Another factor that may surface is how sexually active you have been in the past. Remember that is important to Use it or lose it!
A study in the British Medical Journal; 'Sex and Death, Are They Related?' Davey Smith, G. et al. (1997) showed that Scientists have discovered that men who have frequent orgasms live longer. Researchers found that men who have sex at least twice a week have a 50% lower risk of death than men who have sex than once a month.
Impotence Causing Medications:
American Family Physician has reported that one out of four cases of impotence were the result of drug side effects. If your mate is having erectile problems check with his doctor to find out if his medications are causing the problem.
These are agents that help to arouse or intensify sexual desire. Remember that a healthy lifestyle is the best way to ensure a full and satisfying sex life. Fresh air and nature can invigorate and stimulate us. Regular exercise can increase blood flow and thereby help to stimulate the libido. A common Oriental saying is "The most natural aphrodisiac for a man is a beautiful woman, passionately asking to be enjoyed." Sometimes this works and sometimes it doesn't, so here are a few more hints.
Herbal Preparations:
Damiana Tunera aphrodisiaca, UrB. Damania herb has been used throughout the ages to cure sexual impotence. It has a strong tonic action on the central nervous system and the hormonal systems, acting as an anti- depressant for treating sexual dysfunction. Mexican natives have traditionally used this herb to increase the libido. It is sometimes mixed with Saw Palmetto Berries as a general tonic for the reproductive organs. Be careful, this one is potent!
Angelica Root Angelica archangelica
Angelica is another potent root used to improve circulation and warm the body. It is helpful in the treatment of colds, coughs and all lung diseases. It is also used for treating rheumatic problems. It is a general tonic for improving sexual function. Do not use this root during pregnancy. Diabetics should not use it either, as it increases blood sugar levels.
Aphrodisiacs of the Orient
Astragalus Astragalus hoantchy Huang chi Bok Kay This is a general tonic and stimulant used to increase energy and build resistance to weakness and disease. It is a valuable diuretic. It is frequently used in Chinese formulas for the treatment of sexual inadequacy.
Ginseng Root Panax ginseng Jen sheng Ren sheng
Red ginseng root is an excellent choice for treating sexual dysfunction. It is considered the king of eastern tonics. Ginseng stimulates the entire system to overcome stress and fatigue. It is a beneficial stimulant for the heart and circulatory system. Ginseng reduces "bad" cholesterol and prevents atherosclerosis. It is not recommended for women that have excessive menstrual flow.
Deer Antler Sika Red Deer
The antlers of the Sika Red Deer from Northern China are used as a powerful aphrodisiac for both men and women. Deer Antlers are ground and generally made into a tincture form. It stimulates the hormonal system.
Other traditional eastern aphrodisiacs include:
Ginger root, fennel, mushrooms, black beans, onions, gourds, carrots, wild asparagus, figs, wild rhubarb, licorice, almonds, pistachio nuts, pine nuts, sesame seeds, cinnamon, nutmeg, saffron, black pepper, raisins, grapes, walnuts, honey, millet, orange seeds, as well as wine infused with herbal aphrodisiacs made from grapes, pomegranates, and wild flowers. Aphrodisiacs from animal sources include: Eggs, goat milk, wild fowl, mussels, oysters, fish eggs (caviar), and salmon. There are also aphrodisiacs that can be applied directly to the sex organs. These are used primarily to heat up or cool one down. Great care must be made when mixing together your own concoctions as burning and irritation can result. Many lubricant and general love making aids can be found discretely on-line.
Copyright 2000 Debora Myers is a writer, editor and co-founder of: The Hottest Community for Modern Women: Featuring: Romantic Love Stories, Empowerment, Fantasy, Sexuality, Horoscope Center, Esoteric Wisdom, Advice, Relationship Experts, Chat and Stellar Recipes.
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